Wednesday, June 22, 2011

I Can't Believe it is Really Summer!

I have so many emotions right now.  I'm trying to keep in mind that I am grateful...grateful for everything in my life.  I have so many blessings they are hard to count...my family, friends, work, home...loving husband.  But with all the rush of year end things, I am also having mild depression and panic attacks.  I find myself occasionally thinking of something terrible that happened this past year to Kipp.  I worry about money and bills, and whether or not we should spend money on vacation.  I'm feeling a huge responsibility to my family as mother, caretaker, bill-payer, decision maker, etc.  I watched my son graduate from 5th grade this morning.  All his friends and him looked so grown and ready to go to middle school.  I was a little sad to see the pictures of them growing from Kinder to 5th.  My baby is on his way to a teenager, and I can remember rocking him nightly and putting him in his crib to sleep like it was yesterday.

On the bright side, I went to speech therapy with Kipp today.  I haven't been since I went back to work 2 months ago.  Even though Kipp wasn't feeling his best all day, I remember when we first started with Lance, and am amazed at how well Kipp really is doing.  No, its not perfect, but oh so much better.  So although I've had an emotional couple of days, that helped me to realize that even though the years seem to be flying by too quickly, I have way to much to be thankful for to waste my time being sad.

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