Still love my job...

This week, upon returning to work after fall break, I am grateful to know that I still love my job.  I'm so thankful for the kids, the cute things they do and say, and the fact that I know I'm making a difference in their lives.  Things at home are settling in, as well.  Kipp is adjusting and doing well.  We are planning a camping trip this weekend, so it is giving him something to do.  I can't wait to go.  I miss camping and it will be a fun time with friends:)

When life gives you...

My motto of the day:  When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.  Cliche, I know, but it is all I can think of to try to make me feel better.  Bad news, no worries, we're going to Disneyland! 

So the story is, Kipp is officially not going back to work.  Really, not overly surprising, just disappointing to have to face reality.  I'm still not sure that it is okay for Solar to do that to Kipp.  It makes me very angry that they showed no loyalty to a faithful employee of 20 years.  He knows the job, and he could work into it, but they won't even give him a chance.  Honestly, I feel torn.  Sometimes, I think that Kipp would really struggle going back to work, and it isn't too bad having him at home.  On the other side, I know he is bored and wants to work, and maybe it would be good for him.  I'm not sure if I should do more to find out if Solar can really do this to him.

I know deep down, it will be a tough adjustment, but we will be okay.  We'll have to cut a few things from our budget, like the Y, and some cable channels, and maybe not eating out quite as much.  But we will survive, maybe even be better this way.

And yes, we are going to Disneyland!

My List

These are just some of the little things I'm thankful for that don't necessarily need an explanation, so a list is more appropriate:
Quiet time
my comfy couch
my husband's sense of humor
the visibility when I drive the truck
the funny things kids say
cartoons
soft sheets & blankets
putting my feet up
my to-do list
doctors
motrin
hot showers

Just keep remembering...

Needless to say, with my school year starting, I've been stressed and exhausted.  At the end of the 2nd week being back, I am starting to get into the groove, and not feeling like a walking zombie.  We're coming up on a year since Kipp's stroke, and usually when under stress, I have a lot of dreams/memories of how bad things really got.  I know it is not the best method to deal with the stress, but I actually think these memories serve a purpose to remind me of how lucky I am.  I love to teach and get to every day.  I almost lost my husband, but am blessed with a very strong recovering partner.  No, he can't return to work yet, and I still feel like I do A LOT!  But, these memories remind me to be grateful every day for what I do have, and I have A LOT!

Wow...Summer's Over

Well, not for most of you, but for me, it is back to work.  This aligning with the Sweetwater calendar really sucks!  Timing isn't perfect, but I am enjoying setting up my classroom and even though I don't have the ideal 4th grade team, I am enjoying the adult interaction.  It is rough, teaching/working all day then coming home to deal with "home life".  Kipp doesn't intend to, but is demanding.  He really just wants the interaction and to talk with me.  I actually totally understand where he's coming from and don't mind at all.  Even though I'm usually super tired, I find the energy to be with him and just interact.  So I'm thankful for the "small stuff", as in "don't sweat the small stuff".  It makes me realize still what is really important in life, and has given me a really unique perspective into my school life.  In the scheme of things, I realize what is really important.  The small stuff will just go away and something will take its place.  So I really don't mind the "small stuff" so much right now:)

I Can't Believe it is Really Summer!

I have so many emotions right now.  I'm trying to keep in mind that I am grateful...grateful for everything in my life.  I have so many blessings they are hard to count...my family, friends, work, home...loving husband.  But with all the rush of year end things, I am also having mild depression and panic attacks.  I find myself occasionally thinking of something terrible that happened this past year to Kipp.  I worry about money and bills, and whether or not we should spend money on vacation.  I'm feeling a huge responsibility to my family as mother, caretaker, bill-payer, decision maker, etc.  I watched my son graduate from 5th grade this morning.  All his friends and him looked so grown and ready to go to middle school.  I was a little sad to see the pictures of them growing from Kinder to 5th.  My baby is on his way to a teenager, and I can remember rocking him nightly and putting him in his crib to sleep like it was yesterday.

On the bright side, I went to speech therapy with Kipp today.  I haven't been since I went back to work 2 months ago.  Even though Kipp wasn't feeling his best all day, I remember when we first started with Lance, and am amazed at how well Kipp really is doing.  No, its not perfect, but oh so much better.  So although I've had an emotional couple of days, that helped me to realize that even though the years seem to be flying by too quickly, I have way to much to be thankful for to waste my time being sad.

Love My Life!

There were so many times in the first few months after Kipp's stroke that I would regularly say "FML", particularly in the car while I was alone and had time to wallow.  Now I can honestly say that for the most part, I Love My Life!  I have the best husband, no matter what his needs, he is the best!  My daughter, can be a pain, but she is still sweet at heart.  AND my son, Jaycob, is truly a great kid!  As the school year winds down (2 days and counting), I am reminded by my students of why I love my job, and now that I will have a little break, love the time I get to spend with my family.  I have to remember that this all could have changed 9 months ago.  We could have been the family that had the email announcing a tragedy to the school families, but we weren't, and for that I am really grateful.  My heart goes out to everyone who has to face an unexpected illness or death, but we are on the other side now and actually able to see that no matter what the future holds, we DO have a future.  Once again, for that I am so grateful!!!  I LOVE MY LIFE!