Wednesday, June 22, 2011

I Can't Believe it is Really Summer!

I have so many emotions right now.  I'm trying to keep in mind that I am grateful...grateful for everything in my life.  I have so many blessings they are hard to count...my family, friends, work, home...loving husband.  But with all the rush of year end things, I am also having mild depression and panic attacks.  I find myself occasionally thinking of something terrible that happened this past year to Kipp.  I worry about money and bills, and whether or not we should spend money on vacation.  I'm feeling a huge responsibility to my family as mother, caretaker, bill-payer, decision maker, etc.  I watched my son graduate from 5th grade this morning.  All his friends and him looked so grown and ready to go to middle school.  I was a little sad to see the pictures of them growing from Kinder to 5th.  My baby is on his way to a teenager, and I can remember rocking him nightly and putting him in his crib to sleep like it was yesterday.

On the bright side, I went to speech therapy with Kipp today.  I haven't been since I went back to work 2 months ago.  Even though Kipp wasn't feeling his best all day, I remember when we first started with Lance, and am amazed at how well Kipp really is doing.  No, its not perfect, but oh so much better.  So although I've had an emotional couple of days, that helped me to realize that even though the years seem to be flying by too quickly, I have way to much to be thankful for to waste my time being sad.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Love My Life!

There were so many times in the first few months after Kipp's stroke that I would regularly say "FML", particularly in the car while I was alone and had time to wallow.  Now I can honestly say that for the most part, I Love My Life!  I have the best husband, no matter what his needs, he is the best!  My daughter, can be a pain, but she is still sweet at heart.  AND my son, Jaycob, is truly a great kid!  As the school year winds down (2 days and counting), I am reminded by my students of why I love my job, and now that I will have a little break, love the time I get to spend with my family.  I have to remember that this all could have changed 9 months ago.  We could have been the family that had the email announcing a tragedy to the school families, but we weren't, and for that I am really grateful.  My heart goes out to everyone who has to face an unexpected illness or death, but we are on the other side now and actually able to see that no matter what the future holds, we DO have a future.  Once again, for that I am so grateful!!!  I LOVE MY LIFE!

Friday, June 10, 2011

The Year is Wrapping Up...

At least the school year, that is.  Today is the last Friday of the year, only 4 more days next week.  I forgot how absolutely crazy this time of year is.  Not only at school, but at home with the kids wrapping up their school years as well.  Jake, and our whole family has been consumed with baseball.  The Stingrays placed second in North Park Minors, and went onto the Tournament of Champions.  Although fun, they lost both of the first two games, and have one more to go.  I really enjoy the break from work and home, just going and watching the boys play.  We have made some really good friends this year.  Jake is thrilled to have 2 neighborhood boys to play with, Kainoa and Sam.  I am also thrilled to have met Deborah, Kainoa's mother, who only lives 2 blocks away.  She is fun to chat with, and seems to have a really good view/perspective on life.  Our families seem to get along well, even Shelby has found an occasional babysitting gig with them.  I'm hoping these friendships continue for years to come.  I continue to be thankful for friends in all places, and a loving husband who makes my everyday special, no matter how hectic it is.